SPEAKER_04 0:00

Welcome to Filthy Little Secrets, the show where real everyday women get real about sex. We're here to shatter stigma and trample taboo one candid conversation at a time. My name's Marvin, but my readers know me as Morgan Hale, filthy romance author. And I'm your host for this heart-to-heart chat about something most of us think about, dream about, and even yearn for. But few of us feel comfortable admitting it, talking about it, or celebrating it. So let's get filthy together.

Marvin aka Morgan Hale 0:28

Alright. Here we are. Super fun and exciting. I'm here with Deanne. And this is the second time I've gotten to do this where I'm getting to interview someone in person. Um so I'm actually here in my car with Deanne. And she's a friend of mine that um we haven't seen each other in a while. It's been years. Yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_01 0:50

But I've been so looking forward to this. And I am feeding off your energy right now.

SPEAKER_02 0:54

Oh good.

SPEAKER_01 0:55

For anybody that's like not met you, they they just need to be in your presence because you are just full of positivity. So I'm I'm more excited now than whenever I've been.

Marvin aka Morgan Hale 1:04

Well, I mean, yeah, I was like super excited about this too, because of course I do know, you know, something about you, and like I um I was just really excited the fact that you're willing to come and share who you are as a woman sexually and to tell some of that story, and like because I am I mean I'm at a point in my life now where um and you were talking about this earlier, actually, about just like I'm getting to the point where my givea fucks are are evaporating and I'm giving myself more permission to just live authentically.

SPEAKER_01 1:47

Is that not amazing?

Marvin aka Morgan Hale 1:48

You know, and so it's like, and I mean I'm about to be 53 in April, right? So it's taken me a while, but I just feel like I mean what am I here for?

SPEAKER_01 2:01

What's my I mean ultimately that's the question for everyone, right?

Marvin aka Morgan Hale 2:04

Yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_01 2:05

I think everyone wants to know that.

Marvin aka Morgan Hale 2:07

Yeah, and so and so for me, like I feel like I actually know the answer to that. I really feel passionately about um giving my energy to just celebrating whatever's authentic in a woman's sexuality to whatever it looks like, whether it be through my writing or this podcast or whatever way else it comes out of me, I just want to be a cheerleader. I love that. You know, for what's true and authentic about a woman's sexuality. And it could be, I mean, what I've already experienced doing this podcast is it's different for every woman, like what it looks like, you know. And and that's what I love about this podcast is you know, every woman has brought themselves to it and told.

SPEAKER_01 3:01

I will say I've listened back to some of them. I haven't got to go through all of them yet, but it has been so just obviously different thoughts and different opinions on things, but really listening to women open up about their sexuality and about their personal experiences. I think it is beautiful what you're doing. I think it's so fun.

Marvin aka Morgan Hale 3:20

Thank you for being a part of it. You know?

SPEAKER_01 3:22

Oh, I'm excited to be a part of it. I'm I love the fact that you're like empowering women to explore themselves, explore their thoughts about sexuality, and um just kind of seeing where that goes because for me, sexuality is is huge. Um, being, first of all, somebody who has been in the quote unquote lifestyle uh for years and being very open sexually. And then on top of that, uh being a plus size female.

Marvin aka Morgan Hale 3:56

Because I'm there might be some listeners who don't know what the lifestyle is. Um okay, can we change that?

SPEAKER_01 4:04

So lifestyle, so lifestyle can be so many different things. Um, so me in particular, my lifestyle um has involved uh swinging, it has involved um just I don't I I don't want to say just just specifically swinging because for a lot of the time I've been single. And so a lot of people who don't understand like the swinging community kind of there there's a taboo there, there is a misconception about singles in the lifestyle and swinging. Um so for me, I'm very open sexually. I love making friends. Um, I consider myself uh bi-situational. Um so I very much am um emotionally and physically attracted to men, but I'm also physically attracted to women. Um now I am mo emotionally as well, but more on a friend, uh very platonic kind of uh range. But I I I love sexual activities with women and I very much enjoy them with men. That's my my primary go-to. But um with couples and those experiences, I have probably done everything across the spectrum. I've lived out a lot of my fantasies through this through this lifestyle, through um clubs, house parties, uh, went on a bliss cruise. Oh my gosh, that was amazing. Two to like 2,500 people um on a cruise ship where everyone is just so open-minded and friendly, and like nobody's having a bad day when you're with a bunch of swingers. Because it's just everybody's there to be social and to just live their best life. And there were people in their 20s, there were people in their 70s. And I'm gonna tell you, looking at the difference in that, looking at people in their 20s that are just newly experiencing the um the freedom that comes with the lifestyle, and we'll get back well, we'll get back to that in just a minute with the lifestyle situation because that can mean so many different things. But just now exploring their sexuality in their 20s, and then people in my age, because I've just hit my 40s, um, you know, through their 50s, who are very kind of comfortable with everything, but there's still some hiccups. You see a couple in their 70s that are on a lifestyle cruise that are like sunbathing topless on the top deck, and their givea fucks are gone. And it is the most beautiful thing. Like, I don't care if there are sags and and you know, ripples and bulges, and it doesn't matter. Like their bodies and their minds are just beautiful, and I I couldn't help it. Like, I literally would stop myself whenever I'm walking by these older couples, and I'm like, they got it, like they have figured this out, they are living their best best lives, and what a better place to do that, right? And I mean that's that's where you want to be, right? You want to be older and you want to be comfortable with yourself, comfortable inside and outside with your body, with your personality. And they were doing it, and I'm like, that's where I want to be in 20, 30, 40 years. Um, and I love it. So going back to you know, the lifestyle thing, that can be any version of some people, their lifestyle is BDSM. Um, there are people that are poly that would be considered a a different lifestyle. So lifestyle is really anything um relationship or sexually oriented that is not that is outside of the norm.

SPEAKER_02 7:41

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 7:41

Um, so different types of lifestyles, different types of people. For me, it is all about sexual openness. Um, and I I hate the word promiscuity because that kind of again, that has that taboo ring to it.

SPEAKER_02 7:55

Right.

SPEAKER_01 7:55

Um, but realistically, I'm I I feel like people who are open to new sexual experiences, open to new partners, there's so much communication, so many different people, personalities, um, you know, places, experiences, things that come into that. And it's beautiful. It is beautiful. I love the people that I've met along my journey. Um, and that has encompassed people that are, you know, much older than me, same age, younger, um, different mentalities, um, different political views. I mean, it really is a place where I love this so much.

Marvin aka Morgan Hale 8:33

You know what I love about that particular detail is I mean, we are definitely, I feel like in the last, I don't know, however many years, but with the current election, I mean, we're definitely in a time when the the divisiveness and this the you know, you're on that side, I'm on this side, and like on Facebook it's like war, and people just and I love I love the idea that like the energy of sexuality could transcend that and that you could actually, you know, put politics aside and just see someone and be attracted to them and experience them and be like, you know what? I mean, I disagree with you, you disagree with me, whatever, let's fuck. I mean, to me that's you know I hadn't thought about it like that, but yeah. Right. I mean, because at the end of the day, we're all human beings. And we're so anyway, I'm sorry. I just when you said that, I was like, I love that so much. That's yeah.

SPEAKER_01 9:34

But it's it's true though. I mean, different races, different cultures, like just people coming together and being people. One of my favorite experiences, and I I retell this very, very frequently um to people who are newer coming into the lifestyle and just learning, you know, maybe a curiosity about swinging or about, you know, being with a couple or threesomes or um just joining any kind of variation in there. And I say the most beautiful thing about the lifestyle is all the people coming together in ways that you would not expect because we did a I have friends that they do activities at their home. They have um they've done house parties in the past, they have big group get-togethers, some of them are you know lifestyle only, some of them are family friendly, and when you go to a family-friendly event, you are vanilla. And by vanilla, you do not bring up the lifestyle, you it is not a sexual get-together, it is it is just a very clean, family-friendly um get-together because you don't know who else is going to be there, and nobody wants to out anybody to their children or their families or anything like that. So, um, but they did a bonfire one night, um, so it's probably been six or seven years ago. And that night, um, I remember I just had this moment where I'm looking around this bonfire, and we've got um, we have a friend. He's I I I'm not gonna say his name, but he's the he's the naked guy. He's like the first one that's naked at every party. And it's not even sexual, it's just him being him because there are people who just love to be, you know, free without clothing, and that's their thing, and I'd love that for them. Um, but yeah, so he's he's running around naked, and other guys running around naked, and they're just like living their bro life. And I'm sitting there next to next to the guy's wife, and I'm like, okay, this is this former marine chick, like complete badass girl that I'm sitting next to. Like me, I'm just, you know, who am I? But she is sitting next to a doctor who is sitting next to a truck driver, who is sitting next to a nurse practitioner and a lawyer and a waitress, and I mean, literally, I'm just looking around, and uh, not to identify everyone by like their occupation, but it's like we had um Hispanic, we had Caucasian, we had um, we had black, we had, you know, all these different people coming from different places, we had different age ranges, probably a 30 to 40 year age gap from the oldest to the youngest. And everyone is just having the best time and being friends and being open. It's like we came together to have this one moment where everyone is just equal and happy to be with each other. And oh my god, I loved it. I literally just like it's like everything paused around me, like you see in the movies. And I'm just looking around, and you know, the the fire is kind of doing its little ember thing, and it's looking at the people, I'm like, this is beautiful. This is just a beautiful moment that really just encompasses everything that I think about the lifestyle because we if most people think it's about sex, swinging is about sex, swinging is about opening up yourself to new experiences with new people, yeah, and how beautiful is that. So yeah, so that's where I am with that. So that's what the lifestyle is. We kind of went on a high tangent there.

Marvin aka Morgan Hale 12:59

That was perfect. That was a beautiful explanation. I mean, yeah, I think well, because you've been around it too. I mean I have, I've been around it for a long time, and I mean that's how experienced people that, you know, in one way or another identify themselves as a part of it. Is I mean, to me, to be somebody that wants to explore, you know, coloring outside the lines in terms of what society deems is appropriate sexually, it requires somebody to just be really kind of an open-minded person in general to to want to do that, you know, and to kind of and and you know, and really, I mean, uh particularly like, you know, the folks that are, you know, married, and then we live in a society that, you know, marriage is like a foundational relationship structure that holds everything up. And so, you know, to try to to to to be like, hey, my wedded for life partner, we're gonna explore this together, uh, you know.

SPEAKER_01 14:02

But I think right there, you're saying like the most important thing together. So I think that's really, really important for people to understand whenever they're talking about the swinging community is that a lot of people think, oh, well, they're swinging. How could you do that to your partner? Ultimately, how beautiful is it that their communication skills are amazing enough that they can say, you know what, these are my desires, these are my interests. I don't know if it's going to work out the way that I want it to in my mind, but this is how I'm feeling. And this is this is my my fantasy or this is what I would like to see. And then having that other person, I mean, because people are judgy, having that, taking that risk to say that out loud and having your partner look back at you and say, you know what? I have had the same feelings, or I don't have those same feelings, but let's explore this. And so for having two people that are committed to each other open themselves up to explore new situations and bring bring new people in. People are scary. Yeah, people are scary when you don't know what you're getting into, and new experiences are scary. But to be able to have those conversations of, you know, the these are our limits. This is what we're this is what we would like to see, this is the anticipation, um, this is what we need to do if we get in this situation. And then every experience is a new learning opportunity. So, you know, I mean my ex and I, um, you know, I did this, I did the swinging community for years as what they call a unicorn, um, which is a typically a bisexual female in the lifestyle or in the swinging community, um, but as a single, and so I got to experience that. I got to see some amazing couples with amazing communication skills. And then uh my last relationship, which lasted three years, um, we took on the swinging aspect, and just for the record, the relationship did not end because of the swinging. Yeah. Because that's actually, I feel like, part of what held us together for so long because of the communication.

SPEAKER_02 16:02

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 16:03

Um, but you you go into these experiences and every every opportunity that we have, we would go to something and we would be communicating on the way there. You know, what are you most excited about? What are you looking forward to? Is there anyone that you've talked to online or that we've met before that you're really excited to see? Is there anything you're not comfortable with tonight? Because that's another thing is what I'm comfortable with today, I may not be comfortable with tomorrow.

SPEAKER_02 16:28

Right.

SPEAKER_01 16:28

Um, so again, that's so much communication. And then we would go and we would experience these activities and and people and events, and then on the way home, those were the best conversations.

SPEAKER_02 16:42

Oh, yeah.

SPEAKER_01 16:42

Because that was our opportunity to say, you know, I really enjoyed this. I didn't know that I would, but I did. Um, I thought that I would be okay with this, but I wasn't. Um, maybe next time that this happens, maybe we can do it a little differently so that I can feel more comfortable. And every time that that happened, we learned more and more about each other. And so every opportunity, every experience was just that that much better because we became so close and we became, you know, we gained an understanding and we knew where the hard limits were, we knew where the soft limits were, we knew when we needed to communicate with each other, we knew when we got to the point where we didn't have to communicate because we just knew that you know, this is okay, this isn't. And it's beautiful whenever it works like that. Um, so I yeah, that I don't even know where I was going with that whenever I started talking.

Marvin aka Morgan Hale 17:36

Well, no, but that's awesome. I mean, that's I mean talking about, I mean, I had, I would say it was when I I think I was just starting to discover, you know, that there were non-monogamous people. Um, and I was reading this book called Opening Up, it's by this author, Tristan Terramino, and she and I love that book because she kind of like what you're saying, she interviewed all of these different people and all of these different types of relationship configurations, and none of them are were the same, but none of them were like straight, strict monogamy. It was all some type of creative variation. Creative variation that they had I love that. And and she was just inter and the book is just her like telling all of these different people's stories about, and then she kind of gets in a little bit about, but anyway, I was reading that book and I was I've seen a therapist at the time, and I told him, you know, that I was reading this book and I was thinking about it, and he told me he was like, Marvin, the I've counseled a lot of couples, and he was like, and I've counseled a lot of couples that are in the lifestyle, and I can tell you that generally speaking, those couples that are in the lifestyle have superior communication skills in their relationship, they have worked out, and he was like, they have just a deeper intimacy and a communication with each other that they've developed through doing that together. And so he's like, I personally think if it's something that they're both consenting to do together, that it's good, you know, to go on that adventure together. And and because he's like, I've seen anyway, just to the point of what you're saying, you know, that yeah, I mean it can deepen.

SPEAKER_01 19:18

Oh, absolutely. And and you know, there are times that you have to take a step back too. Because I've seen that with with friends that they get to a certain point and their communication skills are not where they need to be, or they have something tremendous go on in their life, and they say, you know what, and again, it's still communication. You know, this is not working for me at this time, I need to pull back. Yeah, and so watching those couples go through that, it's it's beautiful. And I feel like I've taken something away from that, even for me now being back single, um my communication skills I feel have improved so much because talking to new people and pulling that out of them of what is it that you are looking for? What is it that you really seek sexually? Um, what is it that you seek emotionally? Because ultimately sex is wonderful, but it's that deeper emotional connection, and there's so many different connections that you get. There's more than just oh, I want to be with you long term, there's also friendships. There's also this is a moment in time where we are connecting, you're you know, you're connecting with another person, and it is beautiful for the moment. Sometimes it's just funny. We all have experiences, and I I hate it whenever people get so caught up in like negative moments during sex, because let's just face it, like noises, sounds, things happen during sex, and then people will be like, oh my gosh, I farted during sex.

Marvin aka Morgan Hale 20:51

Reminded me of the last night that I saw you. I mean, I had one of these moments. It was so I mean I'm sorry, I have to tell the story because it was just so hilarious. So we were in a pool, right? At this is it okay if I disclose we were at this party. Okay, we were at this party, right? And there was this woman who I um you know know, and she's a friend of mine, and she's in the lifestyle, and um but we were in the pool together and we were talking, and and we we had been together before and had chemistry together, and and it was stirring up again, and I could feel it, and you know, she's looking at me and I'm looking at her. And so um I tried to lift her out of the pool, except we were in the deep end. So I had nothing under me to like so I tried to push her up and I just pushed myself down and tried, but I was like determined I was gonna help her out of this pool. And you know, my hand is like on her ass, and I'm like pushing, and I'm like the worst dirty dancing sequence ever. I'm gonna drown myself trying to do this because I Do not have I'm not my feet aren't touching the bottom of this pool, so I'm like kicking trying to swim, and it's like not sexy at all, you know. It's just like a complete fail. Um, but anyway, we I survived it.

SPEAKER_01 22:15

Congratulations, I'm so glad to see you're here.

Marvin aka Morgan Hale 22:18

That's right. I didn't I didn't drown, and she got out of the pool, and and I ended up like she was like sitting on the side of the pool and she spread her legs, and I buried my face in between her legs and just went to town, and it was an amazing and there's all these people all around us, and it was so beautiful and amazing, and I I just felt like I'm glad I didn't drown.

SPEAKER_01 22:41

Well, but I'm glad you didn't let that hold you back.

Marvin aka Morgan Hale 22:44

Yeah, exactly.

SPEAKER_01 22:45

And I think that's the point of it. Like, um, you know, like I said, like things happen. I I had this early on going into the lifestyle, I had this I I don't know if I want to call him a lover, and I guess I do just because of the age gap. Uh, because he was in his or he was in his mid-50s. I was I was 30. And he is a um psychology professor, or was at the time. And he helped me get so much understanding of myself and acceptance of myself because we were we were together, we were um playing. It was the first or second time we had gotten together, and there were sounds. I mean, there were sounds, and there was liquid. I mean, I was I was squirting and there was orgasms, and you know, things happened, and I was so embarrassed, I was so just appalled that, you know, first of all, here's this, you know, professor that is older than me and so much more experienced than me, and he's giving his attention to me. And here I am, little 30-year-old BBW that I am, uh, making all these sounds and and a mess on his bed. And I was just mortified. And he looked at me and he said, Hold on. He said, I want you to know that anything that happens while we are together and while we're being intimate is just beautiful and it's just part of it. Yeah, don't be embarrassed, don't get inside your head. Any mess that we make, we can clean up, anything that gets broken in the process, we can fix or replace. Um, any sounds that happen don't matter. The only sounds that matter are you're moaning and you're feeling good and you're not getting in your head because this is gonna be a beautiful experience. But if you let it get in your head, then we're not gonna move past that. And that has stuck with me um through the years, and so I've learned as I've gotten older, I've learned as I've gotten older just to really appreciate and laugh at all the little things that happen that are unexpected. Um and looking back, there's so many funny stories because and I I I kind of love to become a comedian with this. Um, you know, I've I've had an experience on the side of a hot tub where he got going really, really good. The next thing I know, I'm flipping over backwards. I am fate, I am like coming up for air from the hot tub. Like he just knocked me in backwards. I look up, he is still like in the position, like humping the air because it just happened so that image of him just like which way did she go, George? Um, you know, and my more recently I got with this uh wildlife rescue guy who has a free range possum in his house.

SPEAKER_02 25:28

Oh wow.

SPEAKER_01 25:29

And so we were we were getting a little frisky. We'd already gone through a couple of rounds and taken a break, and I'm like, oh, I'm gonna get this going again. Um, so I'm I am on my knees and I had not bothered to put any panties back on. I had a dress on. And so I'm like, oh yeah, I'm gonna look sexy. I'm gonna get down on my knees, I'm gonna, I'm gonna give him a blowjob, and I'm looking up in his eyes, so I'm not paying attention to anything else in the room. It's just me and him and his cock in my mouth. And all of a sudden I felt this little lick. And I'm like, I look down and here's this little old, like elderly possum just kind of like walking around, walking away. Like, yep, I did that. And I'm like, how many, how many people in this world can say they got their pussy licked by a possum?

Marvin aka Morgan Hale 26:20

Uh-huh. Right. And it's in the middle of a, yeah.

SPEAKER_01 26:26

So it's like whenever you start a story off with, so I had a possum lick my pussy.

SPEAKER_02 26:33

It's gonna get the the whole room goes quiet because there's gonna be questions.

SPEAKER_01 26:39

But it's and it's like like seriously, I can sit here and be mortified. Oh my gosh, a a wild animal like did that to me. Now everyone's gonna think you're an obese, you know, whatever. It it's not obese. It literally was just a hilarious moment. And you know, I I freaked out for a second because I didn't know what it was, and then I saw what it was, and then I laughed. I laughed so hard. And and realistically, I'm I'm 40 years old, I'm yeah, I'm 40 years old, and um, I've had two kids, and I may have even honestly peed a little bit. I'm not even gonna joke. Because things happen, and you know what? We we moved on. We laughed about it, we had a great time on the this is gonna be a good story later. But if if every time you it like in parts happen, um sounds happen, liquids happen, possums happen.

Marvin aka Morgan Hale 27:31

But yeah, you just never know. Reopen yourself up to experiences, you know. You might run into a possum on the way.

SPEAKER_01 27:38

You might run into a possum on the way. Um, but yeah, those are those are so fun. I mean, uh again, objects get broken, things happen. How many memories?

Marvin aka Morgan Hale 27:48

Right.

SPEAKER_01 27:48

And if you if oh my gosh, that I have such a bad thing. That is not the story you tell your grandkids.

Marvin aka Morgan Hale 27:59

In the rocking chair on the front porch of somewhere, talking to your friends, and be like, eh, then there's that time.

SPEAKER_01 28:06

Oh yeah, that's gonna be so confusing when I've lost my mind and I'm talking to my grandkids, like, yeah, that time, the possum looking.

SPEAKER_02 28:16

Uh but um good.

SPEAKER_01 28:18

But no, I love that. I love just whenever people can just embrace those moments and embrace the sounds and the noises and everything that goes with it and just go with it.

Marvin aka Morgan Hale 28:26

Yeah, yeah. Or humanity.

SPEAKER_01 28:29

Uh yes, we're all humans. And things happen. Possums happen.

Marvin aka Morgan Hale 28:34

That's right. Possums have oh my god, that's gonna have to be like a hashtag when we release this episode. Possum play. Possums happen. Possum play.

SPEAKER_01 28:46

Oh no, no, no, no. That just no, that's a whole different volume.

Marvin aka Morgan Hale 28:50

That's a different episode.

SPEAKER_01 28:52

That is not my episode.

Marvin aka Morgan Hale 28:53

That's not your episode.

SPEAKER_01 28:54

To each their own.

Marvin aka Morgan Hale 28:55

To each their own, but that's not what this was. To be clear listeners, this was a one-time freak. The the possum snuck in, ran off.

SPEAKER_01 29:05

Yeah, it was it was not planned, it was not a thing, it was not it was not enjoyed. It is just a funny antidote of a story now. Um kind of.

Marvin aka Morgan Hale 29:13

Well, well, thank you for telling us for um, but yeah, so So like what I mean, what do you see for yourself? Like, you've had these experiences, you've kind of, you know, you have like an idea of who you are and what you want. Like what what are you hoping to sort of create in your future sexually as a like the life that you so I'm at the point now where um I don't know.

SPEAKER_01 29:40

I I don't know so let's let's separate sexuality versus relationships. So I don't know that I'm ready to just jump right back into like a long-term relationship. Um so with that, I'm kind of exploring the two of those like simultaneously and not um just kind of parallel. Um so uh sexually I've I've lived out a lot of my fantasies. You know, and I'm just gonna throw like I've I've I've had the girl, I've had the threesomes, I've had the four sums, I've had the orgies, I've had the gangbangs, I've you know, been there, done that, and so many good experiences from all of those. Um so now it's really just about meeting people and having experiences with people and feeling their energy. Like I talked about, your energy is so amazing being in the being in the same like car with you because we're parked over here, you know, next to the lake.

Marvin aka Morgan Hale 30:38

We are we're parked by the lake in the dark. It looks, you know, it's like who knows what they're doing in there. We're recording a filthy secrets episode. That's what we're doing.

SPEAKER_01 30:46

No one would expect it.

Marvin aka Morgan Hale 30:47

No one would expect it. It's our filthy little secret. Me and Dean.

SPEAKER_01 30:51

So now it's I I love meeting people, I love learning about them, I love having experiences with people, and every person is so unique, and every experience is unique. So even as you build friendships and continue to to come back to them for for new um situations, and every time is new and it's different and it's exciting and it's beautiful. And uh my my favorite time is the the aftercare time in quotes. Um you know, after you've after you've played hard and you've you know given it your all and you have that time afterward where it's where you can just sit down and talk and communicate and express your your joy and your um just really what you got from the experience. And I think that's very important. I think having that that time to look back and share of what was really good for you and what you really enjoyed about the other person and getting feedback on yourself as well, and you know, hopefully the person that you're with is not just an asshole. Hopefully they're they're good with their constructive criticism as well. But um, to learn more about them and what makes them tick and what they're interested in sexually and non-sexually, because I learned so much about people.

Marvin aka Morgan Hale 32:14

I have a few friends with benefits, and we've started calling it sex therapy because we have that that aftercare time where this sounds like such an amazing idea. All right, so aftercare with your sex therapy session with your friends with benefits partner, like what I don't know, if you were like what what does that look like?

SPEAKER_01 32:36

What are the so I mean after after someone has been inside of you, yeah, um, and and you've again the noises and the sounds and everything, why can we not open up emotionally? And it doesn't have to be like, oh, I want to have this long-term intimate relationship with you, right? But just to open up to another human being, just be like, look, this is what's going on in my life, and and this is what what I'm going through, and you know, to to open up about yourself and then to to share with another person of you know, this is why I enjoy this time with you, and to find out what's going on with them. And what a better connection than whenever you're so whenever you're completely sated, you know, you've broke the sweat, there, you're laying there naked. Why isn't emotions our taboo?

Marvin aka Morgan Hale 33:25

Yeah. I love you and I think so much alike when it comes to this. Like, this is verbatim, exactly how I think about it to me. That's like, yeah, because our bodies have this incredible, like, I mean, there are these chemicals that like cause us to be in a place where if we're open to it, the capacity to connect in that moment is so profound. And it's like, yeah, I love the way you said it, but this person was just inside of me. We've had this very intimate interaction with each other. We've both, you know, I mean, hopefully we've both reached orgasm, and like both of our bodies are just we're like my when I have an orgasm, my heart just explodes wide open, you know. Like I feel all of the and it's not like this, it's like you said, it's not necessarily like, okay, now let's get married. Right. It's just I will remember this moment with you for the rest of my life.

SPEAKER_01 34:20

It is, it is a very, I think orgasms are so are very freeing.

Marvin aka Morgan Hale 34:23

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 34:23

I mean, what more vulnerable period moment in your life when you are most of the time you're completely naked, sometimes you're not. But to be completely naked and exposing your your most intimate parts to another human being and then just magic happens, like full mental and physical explosion. And I think that's the thing. I don't know about for men, I know for women, um, and the women that I've talked to, it is a very mental um stimulation for for orgasm. And and I I I saw this thing recently, and it was uh for men, men can't think about anything to obtain orgasm. Women have to focus to have an orgasm. And I I I've been uh you're so you're you're a guy, tell me, whenever are you are you able to whenever you achieve orgasm.

Marvin aka Morgan Hale 35:20

Um I for me a lot of thought is involved in it, you know, and and like for me, like probably things that are arousing thoughts has to do with um, you know, if I'm with it's so funny too, because like I hear like online, you know, there's these men that talk about, well, it's almost like a return of purity. I'm using air quotes here, purity culture where it's like I don't want a woman if she's been with too many men or whatever. I mean, for me, that is so erotic. Like to be with a woman who's had lots of experiences with different people, and if she's opened up and shared that with me, I bring like the the it's to me, it's as sexy as her getting naked physically. That that she like shared these experiences and what it was for her and why it was sexy and how it was erotic for her. Like, if I know those stories, then um then when I'm going down on her and burying my face in her pussy, it it is like it's it's honestly like a worship of her pussy and her energy and her like everything that she's done with her sexual person and her vagina. Like I feel this intense, um it's like worship. And it's not just of the physical part of her, it's like really it's almost like the energy that's represented in her body, in that part of her body.

SPEAKER_01 36:55

And I love that.

Marvin aka Morgan Hale 36:56

And my cock gets hard. Like, I'll be doing that, and I'm like, you know, I'm like, oh those things just been, you know, I'm like, the the cocks that she's had in this pussy, and I mean, yeah, I just that for me is um is is so so my head's totally in it, you know. I can tell. Yeah, when I'm in a sexual experience with somebody. And and so, and so, you know, I love the the way you're describing, you know, like interacting with people in the life. Because for me, I mean one of the things that's been hard for me, like uh when I've interacted with people in the lifestyle, is I mean, there have been some people that don't want to really get to know you or you know that's oh yeah, there's always people that this is sex and this is what we're gonna do, and if you're not into just like going for it, then then we're done.

SPEAKER_01 37:52

I mean, there's there's those people.

Marvin aka Morgan Hale 37:54

Yeah, and that's fine for them, but that's not a fit for me. Like I, you know, I am I'm uh what will be arousing for me is is to learn about you and and what you've and and you know, and particularly like who you are sexual because to me, like the whole this woman has been killing her culture and she has done things with her pussy that some people would just drop their chin and be like, She did what? And I'm like, Yes, she did. Let me eat it, you know. I'm like, that's that's um that's who I am.

SPEAKER_01 38:27

See, and I've I have those experiences too. Again, I love getting to know people, but then I've also I love those moments um where you literally just make a non-verbal connection with someone. And I've only I've literally only had this happen a handful of times. Um but you just make eye contact with someone and there is just that instant connection. Yeah. And you know nothing about them, you don't know their name, you don't know their story, which I love knowing people's stories. I love that. Um but in that moment, it just doesn't matter. And most of the time, obviously, this is consenting, this is typically happening, for being it like a lifestyle event or you know, a house party or something. Um, but you have that instant connection and you have that physical connection. And then I've had those moments where literally you just gave me 10 orgasms and I can barely, I can barely breathe. And I'm like, ah, my name's Dean.

Marvin aka Morgan Hale 39:28

By the way, my name is Dean. Yes, yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_01 39:31

Yeah, or even not even share names and just walk away and just have that moment, you know, where I'm thinking, you know, five years down the road, it's like, oh my gosh, the the guy with the amazing eyes that we had that that instant connection. And it was beautiful for what it was, it was beautiful.

Marvin aka Morgan Hale 39:48

Yeah, yeah. So yeah, and I absolutely believe it. Like, you know, like I I also in my life have friends who are, I mean, they're psychic, you know, they have like this ability to and then I think that all of us have I mean, I think of them as psychic moments where it's what you just described. It's like something communicated between us that wasn't verbal, but it was like so clear. And I knew it and I felt it, and I just wanted to. Absolutely. And I just yeah, I mean, I um yeah. I mean, I think that's how people, you know, connect really is that it starts with something that before we even have the courage to speak it out in words, you know, it's like Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 40:32

But again, I I do so there are those instances, but I think we were going back to we were going back to sex therapy. And so all no, no, no. I was just thinking like all of these different things, all these different moments and experiences and and everything. And so you're having these experiences with someone and then coming back to a place where again you're super sated and you've you've been connected intimately. And so why is that not the perfect time to just be human with each other? And that's what I want. I love those moments. I I almost I I probably love I do love those more than than the sexual connection because I have friends that we're we're literally getting together and we're having these moments, we're having this experience together, and then we're catching up. And to say things that you can't say to anyone else in your life, and to know that it's a safe space, how beautiful is that?

SPEAKER_02 41:33

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 41:34

I feel like I I feel like more people need to have like safe spaces and and friendships where there's zero judgment. And even if I don't agree with you, I can at least listen to you and give you that part of myself. But it all it all goes back to just sex and emotions and relationships, and there's so many different types, and I don't know why we have to box everything up.

SPEAKER_02 41:57

Right.

SPEAKER_01 41:58

Um I love it.

Marvin aka Morgan Hale 42:02

You're talking about that, and I'm just I'm thinking about this a little bit. So this is kind of a woo-woo thing, maybe. But um, like literally earlier today, I don't think this is coincidence. Uh uh did this um, it was a session, this woman, and she um she did she did like a she called it kundalini activating.

SPEAKER_01 42:24

Okay.

Marvin aka Morgan Hale 42:24

Okay, so what the idea of it is is that our sexual energy is like at the it's down here. You know, I'm touching my genitals right now. And that it's that it I will verify that. It's uh it's like and it's creative energy, it creates life and it it's uh like our creativity stems from it, and and so the way she describes it is is that it naturally wants to move up through the body and and enrich every part of us.

SPEAKER_02 42:53

Okay.

Marvin aka Morgan Hale 42:54

And that, you know, um, and that activating it is really just exercising, enhancing our life, and and letting this energy, you know, rise up. And so, so anyway, she like facilitated this whole thing. But but what was intriguing to me about it is just the way that she talked about it. And and to me, it's so similar to what you're saying that that this the sexual energy that we have has the capacity to just l like light up our whole life, light up our relationships.

SPEAKER_03 43:27

I love that.

Marvin aka Morgan Hale 43:28

And and that if we're just open to letting it happen, that it can forge this incredible community, it can forge, you know, bonds, it can forge like, you know, breaking down barriers between different socioeconomic classes, different races, different political, different whatever. It can absolutely just forge these bonds between people.

SPEAKER_01 43:52

And it does.

Marvin aka Morgan Hale 43:53

And yeah.

SPEAKER_01 43:54

If you let it, it does. Because I've seen it and just like we were talking just like I was talking about earlier with that that Bonfire and that moment, and it was just beautiful. And every time I go to events and get togethers, I I see it. And it's amazing. People that in the everyday world would not have anything in common come together over an open-mindedness. They may not even be into the same things. But because they're open-minded, they can be in the same, they can be in the same area, they can be in the same group, they can enjoy each other. So I love that.

SPEAKER_02 44:35

Me too.

SPEAKER_01 44:37

I'm so happy.

Marvin aka Morgan Hale 44:38

This has been so amazing.

SPEAKER_01 44:42

You know, we didn't we also didn't talk about bodies.

Marvin aka Morgan Hale 44:45

I know. That's another aspect. Oh my gosh. I feel like we need to do this again. Would you be up into that? Maybe coming back for another episode sometime.

SPEAKER_01 44:53

You want to listen to me talk again?

Marvin aka Morgan Hale 44:55

Of course. This is incredible. I would love to. You're a gym. I'm really, really grateful that you came and shared that. Because because yeah, I mean, and I knew it was gonna be this way, but I just even I love the way that you think about all this. I relate to it so much because it's very I mean, it you said so many things that really resonated with how I also think about it. And I just um believe that there's uh I don't know. I think I think it's what you said, but before we even started recording, I think you said this that you know it's just like when you talk about this stuff and you break down the taboo, it opens doors for you know other people.

SPEAKER_01 45:35

Absolutely, and that was the goal. That's the whole reason that I came here.

Marvin aka Morgan Hale 45:38

Yeah, thank you.

SPEAKER_01 45:39

Um because I really want I want especially women. Yes, but anyone who has desires or who has fears of being sexually open to just be able to break through those and even just communicate them because sometimes it's just a thought, but you keep it in your head and you carry it around because it's so wrong. You the world sees it as so wrong, and why? Yeah, I mean, unless it's illegal or it's e just completely immoral. Um, you know, there are some things that that we don't go to, but as far as adults who are willing and consensual and open, why? Why do we have to hide that part of ourselves and then be ashamed of it? And I've done that too whenever I was younger. Do something and then turn around and be completely ashamed of it. Or um, you know, in the past being uh having multiple partners and being open to that, and then later on feeling the shame of oh my goodness, I had you know, I and and I go back to I had three partners in one day in different set different uh situations, and I'm like, Oh, I'm such a horrible person. And that to me now, because I had someone recently tell me that they're like, Oh, I slept with three people in the same day. And I said, Did you did you give anyone false expectation? Was there any lies that were spread between you? Did you tell them that they were the only one? Was there a relationship? Did you do something that you shouldn't have? No, no, of course not. Everything was on the up and up. Why are you a horrible person? Yeah, because you are one of the best people that I know. Like this this this woman, literally, she she volunteers, she has kids, she does um, she helps out with the Cub Scouts, she is anytime someone needs her, she is like the step-up person. And yet, because she is sexually, because she had three partners who were all willing, who all knew what they were getting into and agreed to it, suddenly she sees herself as this horrible person.

SPEAKER_02 47:47

Right.

SPEAKER_01 47:47

And that is so wrong.

Marvin aka Morgan Hale 47:49

Right, yeah, yeah. And I've experienced I've experienced that too. The the people that I've known in that community are just they're they'll I mean, when you are in crisis, they are the ones that show up on your doorstep, ready to oh absolutely. I mean, it's just incredible.

SPEAKER_01 48:10

Time and time again.

Marvin aka Morgan Hale 48:11

Yeah, incredible people. So I love it. Thank you so much.

SPEAKER_01 48:16

Thank you for having me. I've so enjoyed this.

Marvin aka Morgan Hale 48:19

This has been amazing. You're amazing. Thank you so much for for sharing your truth. It's good stuff. I loved it.

SPEAKER_01 48:29

So um yeah, all right.

Marvin aka Morgan Hale 48:31

This was Deanne. We're hoping to have her back because there's more to share, more good stories. But for now, we're gonna sign off. Thanks for listening to Filthy Little Secrets. I hope we left you feeling light, free, and inspired to explore your filthy sexual horizons. If you want more, subscribe to get all the filthy feature funds. If you're a sex positive woman and like to earn another bra of chain, I wanna talk to you. Wanna come on the show and tell your story? Go to MorganhaleBooks.com slash podcast to learn more. That's M L R T A N H A L E Books.com slash podcast. Until next time, this is Morgan Hale, urging you to keep it real and healthy.