Filthy Little Secrets
A show where women get real about sex.
To praise pleasure.
And bless boldness.
One candid conversation at a time.
Join us for this heart to heart chat about something most of us think about, dream about, and even yearn for, but few of us feel comfortable admitting it, talking about it, or celebrating it.
Let's get filthy together.
Learn more at https://filthylittlesecrets.com/
Filthy Little Secrets
From Sex Swings to Porch Swings: Confessions of a Former Concierge
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In this episode, Stephanie and Marvin delve into their longstanding friendship, exploring candid conversations about sex, personal growth, and memorable experiences. They reminisce about how they met in a mental health hospital, their shared humor, and their transformative journeys. The discussion covers a range of topics, including Stephanie's past work as a high-end concierge, her explorations in sex clubs, and the dynamics of dominance and submission. They also touch on the societal shift away from open discussions about sex and the impact of conservative judgments on people's sexual expression. The episode promises a mix of heartfelt moments and unapologetically filthy tales.
Welcome to Filthy Little Secrets, the show where real everyday women get real about sex. We're here to shatter stigma and trample taboo one candid conversation at a time. My name's Marvin, but my readers know me as Morgan Hale, filthy romance author. And I'm your host for this heart-to-heart chat about something most of us think about, dream about, and even yearn for. But few of us feel comfortable admitting it, talking about it, or celebrating it. So let's get filthy together. Well, hey everybody. I am here with a dear friend I've known a very long time. Don't say this. Well, you know, it's it's been it's been a minute, right? We've known each other. So I have this little forum that I do. It's like an intake for what somebody's gonna be a guest, and she puts. Can
Is That A Vagina?
SPEAKER_02I share what she puts and what it means? Good point. Yeah, so so on this forum, I ask people if there's anything that they want me to include when I publish the episode, like in the show notes, and she just wrote, Is that a vagina? And I busted out laughing as soon as I saw it because the whole backstory behind the question, is it a vagina is that a vagina? Um, so how we met, and this has you know been a minute ago.
SPEAKER_03Yes.
SPEAKER_02Um, we were both going through things in our lives and we needed a timeout, and we needed a timeout. So we we were in um a hospital together, and they judged you if you drank milk. Or they judged you if you drank milk. Yeah, there was, you know, there were some rules. I was I was on suicide watch at the time, but they had these little group meetings that we got to go to, lovely group meetings, yeah. So first day meeting, like literally literally the very first meeting that I went to, and we go in this room. It was your first two, yeah. So so Stephanie and I were both brand new to this. It was our first whole setting. It was our first. And um, and it's like, you know, there's I guess she was like a therapist who was running this meeting. Yeah. She was, I don't even know what she was actually.
SPEAKER_06I can't even want remember what the diagram was.
SPEAKER_02Yeah, she was drawing some kind of diagram on a chalkboard, I think, or a whiteboard. It was a whiteboard, yeah, yeah. And it was supposed to be, you know, for our mental health. Um, I don't know, something to support our, you know, trying to work our shit out, basically. Who knows? And uh, but anyway, so Stephanie looks at it from the back of the room, and it was kind of a big room, right? Yes, I did. It was sort of a big room. There was, I mean, I don't know how many people were in this group, maybe like 12 or so or something like that. Yeah, yeah. But Stephanie like pipes up and she's like, Does anybody else see a vagina? And I was like, I was like, okay, this person and I are going to be friends because And that's literally what you said to me.
SPEAKER_06Yeah. We are going to be friends, we are destined to be friends. Yeah, yeah. And I watched the person that you've become. And it's it's amazing. Like, I'm proud of you. It makes me proud of you. Thank you. I like how far you've come and I'm like, you've come a long way. Yeah. I mean your books and your podcasts and the people in your life and you know where you are.
SPEAKER_02But no, it's true, I have come a long way because that was I mean, as much as those were low points in my life, those were really turning points for me. Oh, completely. Because I was like coming up against just the right realization that the life the way I was living my life was not working for me.
SPEAKER_06What you thought was the life you were supposed to live.
SPEAKER_02The person I was supposed to be was not who you wanted to be. Failing at that miserably, and as much as I was trying, I was not succeeding.
SPEAKER_06But that's why I was like, I want to do this because we're like-minded,
What's Up, Hooker?
SPEAKER_06we think crazy thoughts and you know.
SPEAKER_02Um I uh Yeah, I mean, I'm just like, even as I'm sitting here, I'm just remembering these little moments where I would hear something that you would say that like a more conservative person would be like, that was outrageous. But for me, it was like, I love her. Like, I'm just thinking about one time that you were I don't even know who you were talking to, but you answered the phone, it was somebody on the other end of the line, and you were like, What's up, hooker?
SPEAKER_06If you can't talk to people for real and be like, hey, you know, I mean, my favorite thing to walk into a room and is like, hey bitches, what's going on? Yeah. Uh so I mean, this just kind of shows my personality. There's a a picture that was on a cup, and it says, Busier than a cucumber in a woman's prison. I sent this to my driver because of where I work. I have a morning driver who unloads stuff from the steel and drops it down for me, right? Yeah. So I sent this to him. I love it. And in 10 minutes, my girlfriend sent it to me. One of my like best friends sent it to me, and I'm like, I had to call her immediately. I'm like, what does this say about me? Then I sent this to my morning crew, and you send this to me.
SPEAKER_02Right, yeah. That's what you're amazing.
SPEAKER_06Yes.
SPEAKER_02Like mine.
SPEAKER_06Yes. And because my favorite word is fuck, as we both know, I have a friend who sends me fuck things every day. Yeah. Where she's like, fuck this, here's a new fuck. I'm up.
SPEAKER_01I mean, fucking cussing.
SPEAKER_06When someone complains, my post contains too much fucking cussing. No. I loved it. My friends get me, and that's what I felt like with you.
SPEAKER_02It was like it was very comfortable.
SPEAKER_06From the minute.
SPEAKER_02Yeah. Yeah. And it was perfect for me because I definitely needed that, you know. Like I was just beginning to kind of unravel like shame about the person I was and the dirty mind that I had, and you know, the things that I wanted to talk about, but felt like, you know, and and so um, and
Getting Filthy on the Porch
SPEAKER_02you were such a safe place for that. And now we're on a podcast called Filthy Little Secrets, which is like, hey, look at us now.
SPEAKER_06And we're sitting on a front porch.
SPEAKER_02Yes, we're sitting on a front porch. I know this is so so listeners. I mean, you you can't see this, but let me just paint the picture. Stephanie lives in this lovely home on kind of a major road. I mean I'd say so. Yeah, I mean, as you if you maybe right outside of the city.
SPEAKER_06Yeah, you maybe so close to the city.
SPEAKER_02Hear cars driving by, and we're just like right sitting on the front porch watching the cars drive by talking about sex. And for all they know, we're talking about this the spring and the blooming flowers and the yeah, but but yeah, and we might move because uh I don't know the background noise, but we had to start here because we'd at least try it out. Yeah, exactly.
SPEAKER_06And there's a tornado watch.
SPEAKER_02There's a tornado watch, but this is how committed we are to talking about sex. That we are not gonna reschedule this unless like it got really bad.
SPEAKER_06But so far, little breeze, little nice breeze, a little nice breeze, you know.
SPEAKER_02Yeah.
SPEAKER_06Hopefully, it doesn't sound like we're standing on a a beach somewhere. Ooh, that would be nice.
SPEAKER_02Although that would be fun. Uh-huh. Yeah.
SPEAKER_06Ooh, that would be at the barside pool.
SPEAKER_02That'll be that'll be another episode. Oh, yeah, there you go.
SPEAKER_06We'll have to have that experience.
Origins of Stephanie's Filthy Side
SPEAKER_02Yes. So so I don't even know that I've ever really asked you this. Okay. But I'm I mean, so I've always experienced you as somebody that was just very open-minded and very like comfortable talking about sexuality.
SPEAKER_03Yes.
SPEAKER_02Have have you always been that way, or was there a time that you kind of had to break out of some kind of shell?
SPEAKER_06Or I was never that way, like when I was younger. It didn't happen until I was in college. And I was definitely that um CSI generation, the original. So um So when you say that, what do you mean? Oh, Lady Heather was in my favorite. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
SPEAKER_02Okay, okay, talk about this.
SPEAKER_06This is what I'm saying. So she was like, you know, I watched all these episodes with her, and then I'm a psych major, so it's like, oh, wait, I can do this. Oh um, and that world is very much not about sex, it's about control. Um and so, you know, being 19, 20, and learning, and then once I was 21, being able to open more
Nashville's Sex Club Scene
SPEAKER_06doors, um, menage. Oh, yeah, yeah, okay.
SPEAKER_02So so I mean, probably m maybe none of the listeners will know about club menage, but that's what you're talking about, right? Yes, I don't think it's not there anymore, right? Yeah, I think it's gone. But Nashville used to have uh really an upscale it was three stories and it was private to get in.
SPEAKER_06Um and it was kind of like um so it cost fifty dollars for a couple to get in, yeah, and it had to be male and female. They didn't recognize um other relationships back then. Once you got in the door and what you did, that was your business.
SPEAKER_05Right.
SPEAKER_06Um there were rooms upstairs on the different floors, um, but downstairs was a bar, it was a meeting area. Yeah. Um
Stephanie's Concierge Business
SPEAKER_06so I don't know, do you remember me telling you what I did at this time?
SPEAKER_02No, I don't think yeah, I've ever heard the story. Okay, so So but you were I mean, how old do you were you at this?
SPEAKER_06Um I was twenty-one, twenty-two. Okay, cool. So I just legit you know, I could drink, um, but I created my own business. Okay. And my name was Cassidy Coleman. Okay, and I was a concierge.
SPEAKER_04Okay.
SPEAKER_06So I worked as a paralegal by the day, but at night I learned how to play the games.
SPEAKER_01Okay.
SPEAKER_06If you want to say. Um, I went to Bar Nashville, um, I went to the underground, I went to Havana State Cafe, I went to the jungle. I mean, it was I learned. And these were great classic bars. And you can go into a bar and you you could watch people, you could observe, and you could learn who had what. And I had what I would consider high rollers, uh that I met other other people.
SPEAKER_01Okay.
SPEAKER_06Um, and through them as a contierge, I would plan a trip in Colorado for him and his wife. Okay, but you've come back to Nashville and you want to go to Minaj. You want to do your thing. You don't want her to know. Well, I made two hundred dollars just from walking in that door with you. And I got to sit downstairs and drink and eat whatever I wanted. You know what I mean? It was it was an interesting lifestyle. So I base that lifestyle off of Lady Heather.
SPEAKER_02Okay. So so just to, I mean, are you okay with me kind of like filling in some blanks in terms of what we're talking about? Go for it.
SPEAKER_06Yeah, I don't know how many people would know about it. And in CSI, yes. Um you can Google her. I mean, it's um Clark is her last name. I can't remember her first name, but basically later Lady Heather was um a dominatrix.
SPEAKER_05Yeah.
SPEAKER_06Um, and she worked with um Grissom NCSI as um like a specialist, um, basically a sex specialist when there were sexual cases or not necessarily deviant, um, but maybe pleasurable, whatever. But they would come to her and seek her advice. And it it was interesting.
SPEAKER_01And so I kind of it was very educational.
SPEAKER_06Uh-huh. Yeah. Um, you know, um I one of my first exposures to brass stables was after um a policeman's ball with four policemen in regular suits, and I'm in a black dress that is very nice, revealing, you know, go to brass stables.
SPEAKER_02Brass stables. I mean, uh I'm trying to remember, but it was
Vaginal Jewelry and Strip Clubs
SPEAKER_02I get completely naked at the time.
SPEAKER_06It was a BYOB.
SPEAKER_02Yeah.
SPEAKER_06And their thing was chains from like lip to lip.
SPEAKER_01Hmm.
SPEAKER_02So you're saying the like performers?
SPEAKER_06I'm talking about like strippers, okay, dancers, um, but they could get completely nude. It was just a BYOB. Gotcha. And be it was called brass stables. So they just had like interesting jewelry from lip to lip. Oh, like piercings? Yes.
SPEAKER_02And this was like a vaginal yes. I say gotcha. Okay, so so the strippers all had these. So from like the left to the right vaginal lip, they had a chain that and that was sort of the trademark of brass stables. Of brass tables. Gotcha.
SPEAKER_06Yes. See, I didn't know that. They would do their dance.
SPEAKER_02Well, Stephanie is giving us some serious Nashville history right now. I did not know this about brass I I don't know if she didn't know about I knew of brass tables. Did you go to brass tables? No, I didn't. I mean, I had heard of it. But you know, I mean, I g I mean I don't know what time Which ones have you been to?
SPEAKER_06Any of them?
SPEAKER_02Uh so there was a period when I was um when I was kind of I don't I don't want to say a tour, but I went to a few. And there was this one club in particular that was out in like all the way out in Smithville.
SPEAKER_06Oh my gosh.
SPEAKER_02And there was a woman who danced there who I got to be friends with, and um and um to this day I'm friends with her. She's an awesome person. She's awesome. But um but yeah, and so having kind of developed like a real preference for her, I guess, you know, and it was like two hours from Nash, it's like past Cookville.
SPEAKER_06Little one horse town. Oh yes. Yeah, there was a pizza head at the time. I don't think there is now. Yeah. Yeah, I know exactly where it is. Yeah, yeah.
SPEAKER_02So I mean, so yeah, I'd say if I've been to a strip club frequently, that one actually, more than any of the ones in. Okay. But you've been to the ones like in Nashville, like when Deja Vu was on the corner. On the corner before they shamed them and ran them off to like uh wherever else.
SPEAKER_06They're done on uh church, I think.
SPEAKER_02Yeah, yeah, I think the Dylan Church. I haven't been there since next to the drag bars.
SPEAKER_06Yeah. Let's shame them all and put them together.
SPEAKER_02Right, put all of the dirty places over on yeah, yeah.
SPEAKER_06Right across the street from the liquor store.
SPEAKER_02Uh-huh. Yeah. Put them all there together. Yeah. Deja vu used to be like right in the middle of Nashville. It was very prominent locations.
SPEAKER_06Yeah, on Demembrian. They shame all those tall high-rises were going up, and they could not have those people looking out of their high-rises at some strippers walking out late at night. You know their wives or their husbands were like, uh-uh, no, no, no, no, no, you ain't looking at that. No, no getting ideas here.
SPEAKER_02Right, exactly. Yeah. But yeah, no, I did go to um Deja vu a few times. And um and there was one dancer in particular there that I had one experience with.
SPEAKER_01Yeah.
SPEAKER_02That was just really, I don't know, it was just for me, it was special. Okay. And I wanted to go back, and but she like when we went back, it was she wasn't there anymore. She had left. She actually was driving down from Kentucky.
SPEAKER_06To go there. Yeah, to do it. That's a lot.
SPEAKER_02Yeah, that's a long way to go. And she was a tattoo artist, and I still remember she had this tattoo across her abdomen that said reckless.
SPEAKER_05And you're like, okay, I kind of love you.
SPEAKER_02I was like, I like her.
SPEAKER_05Now I know why.
SPEAKER_02Yeah, but um, anyway, yeah. Um well, so okay, so you were you were in the Rast Stables and you were there, and so you used the terms I went there as a date for that.
SPEAKER_06Right, as a date. Literally as a date. And but that kind of opened up my world to like some other experiences. That's true, you know, like being able to take high rollers there and um doing things like uh renting out the top of the Hermitage Hotel. Um, I knew the legal concierge there, and he would help me, and I had high rollers buying into card games.
SPEAKER_04Okay. It was rather interesting.
SPEAKER_02That's no, when you said it was rather interesting, are there any like stories that you have that Um well because it's now closed, I can tell you so the owner of Minaj used to supply girls to my high rollers.
SPEAKER_04Okay.
SPEAKER_06And it just was interesting what people liked and what people didn't like.
SPEAKER_04Oh, gotcha.
SPEAKER_06And I could um participate and observe in my games, but m my name was not my name, if that made sense. So my business was Cassidy Coleman. But if you're meeting me in this game, my name is Stephanie. So you don't know who Cassidy Coleman is.
SPEAKER_04Okay.
SPEAKER_06Is that a male or a female? Do you know what I'm saying?
SPEAKER_04Okay.
SPEAKER_06So that was my name that kept me that that kept me safe. That kept me kind of guarding it. Yeah, I see. And so then I could build my business around that.
SPEAKER_01Okay.
SPEAKER_04Gotcha.
SPEAKER_06So it it it was a very interesting business. You know, um,
Stephanie Gets Personal
SPEAKER_06so then the the Dom side of me in my personal life was very different, if that makes any sense.
SPEAKER_02Like how is it different?
SPEAKER_06Um, it I it's very vanilla, maybe I guess.
SPEAKER_01Gotcha.
SPEAKER_06It was more like I needed that connection to be close to them. You know, but when I was younger growing up, for me, sex was like a way to unplug and have control and just be like see ya and not leave my phone number, and I was fine on being the one who got up and left.
SPEAKER_05You know what I mean? Yeah, and girls were supposed to be that way. I never will forget.
SPEAKER_06I moved back home for a little while and I stayed with my mother and my father for a short period. And I had a list of people and positions and things and sizes and how they ranked, and I was typing it up. Gotcha.
SPEAKER_02This is like your little black book.
SPEAKER_06Yes, and I like I left it on my mom's computer. And she read it and said it was the most appalling thing she'd ever read. I'm like, oh I still have that book. And I'm sitting here right now, sitting here thinking and just being like you know, I was never that girl who was, oh, I want the white picket fence, and I want the fairy tale house and the 3.25 kids and the two cars and the dogs and the that was I just didn't see it. Yeah, you know, I was ready to be fixed at 30. I had literally had my appointment. Yeah, I did everything to not be pregnant. I was yeah. And for those who don't know, I had a one-in-one billion shot of a child.
SPEAKER_04Yeah.
SPEAKER_06And he was born on Thanksgiving, so of course I had a lot to be thankful for. But um, you know, it was like after that, my wildness of course changed, and I was 30 and I had to grow up and settle down and be a good girl. Yeah. And then it was like, I feel like those fantasies kind of went away and weren't as much fun. I think you and I had some of those conversations. Yeah, I mean the fact that my husband was very like vanilla and that bro, you know, when I tried to explore those things or talk to him about it or try, it was I'll just have missionary sex with you to make you not think about it again.
SPEAKER_01Yeah. You know what I mean?
SPEAKER_06It was like, I'm the man, nope, we're not gonna do that.
SPEAKER_01Right.
SPEAKER_06So it was um a different perspective of having sex with the person I was married to.
SPEAKER_01Yeah.
SPEAKER_06He just like we would try to, and and he didn't mind like the like like negliges or stuff like that, but don't like try to roleplay or anything. That just never was I don't know, and it was like things that I needed didn't happen or wanted. Yeah. And you know, like our son would be gone. It was like, why can't we hear? And it was like, oh, we have to go to the bedroom. Okay, yeah, and oh our curtains are open. So what we're on the second floor, they can really see us. Right, yeah, you know, what are they gonna see? The shadows, right? I mean, it it just was like little things like that, and so the fact of thinking about God, the curtains are open, somebody might see doesn't really enter my mind. No, you don't worry about it. No, because that's not I don't know. I guess I'm like, well, hey, if that's how you get your rocks off today, more power to you.
SPEAKER_02Yeah, I mean Well, what do you think about? So we've had some filthy conversation on the front porch and watched the cars go by and T he they didn't have a clue what we're talking about, but um, could we go inside and continue? Because I am thinking that we might to this recording later. And Stephanie might have just said something really fabulously filthy, and and it's like, but all we heard was the car. So we're gonna go inside. We're gonna relocate and we'll pick this up in a second. So um so can we go back to Stephanie's timeline? So we were talking about um your business that you had, you're a concierge, you um were being paid to kind of be on the arm of these high rolling gentlemen.
SPEAKER_06As a concierge.
SPEAKER_02As a concierge. And when you say that, what you're saying is you are not having sex with them. No, I
SPEAKER_06Partaking in things, I was going with them. I was they're covered to go other places. I see. But I was like, hey, you want to do you to help you do this? Because I can bring you into here and they don't question.
SPEAKER_02Yeah. Yeah, because I mean I I know Minaj had multiple rooms. Yeah, multiple rooms, and it was like if you were there as a couple, you had access to rooms that you wouldn't have had access to unless you were there as a couple. So correct. Gotcha. So you were the person who was the made of a couple.
SPEAKER_05To get this person in a door.
SPEAKER_02I got it. Okay. Yes. So of course you witness things that, as you said, interesting.
SPEAKER_06A few judges, a few lawyers, a few people that it just kind of was like, oh.
SPEAKER_02Yeah. Yeah.
SPEAKER_06Hey. Hey.
SPEAKER_02Yeah. Interesting.
SPEAKER_06And then, you know, the embarrassment was neither on either party because it was like, We're both here. Got you.
SPEAKER_02Right.
SPEAKER_06You know, and then the next time you're like, hey, judge.
SPEAKER_02Yeah.
Sex Swings, Oral Sex, and the Mile High Club
SPEAKER_02Is there anything that you were ever seeing that you were particularly like, that looks fun, I want to do that?
SPEAKER_06Or things that you swing was always appealing to me.
SPEAKER_02Okay, yeah. So um and when you describe that for people who might not know about a sex wing. Yeah.
SPEAKER_06Um, so in Minage, they did have sex wings. Um, the problem in the rooms in the Minaj, there were multiple sex wings in one room. So you could be having sex and somebody else is having sex right next to you in the same swing.
SPEAKER_05Yeah.
SPEAKER_06But I always kind of thought that that was a rather interesting, I don't know, like um it it could keep you in the air while someone you know performed oral favors for you and or keep them in the air. So you didn't necessarily have to sit on your knees all the time or just I mean, it just always looks very interesting.
SPEAKER_01Like it would be fun.
SPEAKER_06Yes.
SPEAKER_02Yes.
SPEAKER_03Like, how do I scream from this? But yeah. Yeah.
SPEAKER_02Well, I guess too, if you're in the swing, I have not actually ever done this before.
SPEAKER_03See?
SPEAKER_02But I'm just thinking about something about it. You're like it's the suspension of, you know, I mean, there's kind of a surrender in it, I guess.
SPEAKER_06Yes, because you can do the wraps around your ankles and around your feet and around your hands, and you can just be like just completely let it go because there's one around your knees, there's one, you know, because we're like the ribbons even, just like how those gotcha. I don't know.
SPEAKER_02There's so okay, so but this is sort of interesting to me because I mean I have sort of known you to have like kind of this dominatrix sort of thing. Yes, right?
SPEAKER_03Yes.
SPEAKER_02So, but for for that, I mean, that sort of seems like it would be almost a really submissive kind of a thing, right?
SPEAKER_06Oh, I'm I'm totally into someone eating the cookie. That is a huge turn on too.
SPEAKER_02Okay, I gotcha, cool. Yes.
SPEAKER_06So that's my that's my give up. That's my weakness.
SPEAKER_02I gotcha. So you're a little bit of a switch, really.
SPEAKER_06In some aspects, but not really, no. Because I love to be on top. I love that control. I love that like.
SPEAKER_02Gotcha.
SPEAKER_06Nope, not yet. Yeah. Nope.
SPEAKER_02Uh right, yeah, you know. You're gonna tease him. Mm-hmm.
SPEAKER_06Right. Yeah, so that's more like the control part. Gotcha.
SPEAKER_02So your one exception is however. I think the swing would be very good. You wanna put me in the swing.
SPEAKER_06I don't like to be handcuffed. I don't like small spaces, I don't like any of that. I mean, the thought of trying to have sex in an airplane just makes me want to throw up because there's no way it's like bang, bang, you know.
SPEAKER_02It's so funny that you brought this. This came up in another interview on this podcast. We had the exact same conversation of There's no room. How does this work? Yes, we okay, this is realistically no room. This is a call out to all of you ladies listening to this. If any of you have successfully executed the Mao High Club Please let us know.
SPEAKER_06In the laboratory. I'm not talking about in the seat.
SPEAKER_02Yeah, yeah.
SPEAKER_06I'm talking about in the laboratory. Because like in the seat means you probably had the whole row to yourself.
SPEAKER_02I mean, we want to hear about it. We want you to come on the show. We want you to tell the whole story because we're really curious. This is this is a recurring theme.
SPEAKER_06I'm telling you, dude, it's yeah, yeah, it's like clown cars. No, it just does not work. Yeah. Even your elbow, your leg up here, then what's he gonna do? Sit on the toilet, stand on the toilet. Right. Then if he's sitting on the toilet, there's nowhere for his legs to go and his legs are crammed like this. I mean, you know what I'm saying.
SPEAKER_02It's like seems challenging.
SPEAKER_06Seems very I want to know how this works. So, so you have not experienced this either.
SPEAKER_02No, I have not. Okay. I mean, you know, and I've heard people talk about it, and I think, well, in in concept, it sounds fun until you go into the lavatory and you're looking around and you're trying to size up the situation, and it's like There ain't no way. How do people pull this off?
SPEAKER_06They must be very short.
SPEAKER_02Yeah.
SPEAKER_06Because even the the girl would have to be like really short to like because you know how it angles and goes sideways anyway.
SPEAKER_02And there's not any headroom.
SPEAKER_06Yeah, so that's always my thing. Headroom. I mean, there is none, you know. I don't care what they're doing. If she's sitting on the toilet and he's standing up, what is he doing? Yeah, yeah, yeah.
SPEAKER_02It's it seems like it's not the but a swing on the other hand.
SPEAKER_06I'm just saying there's something about that because it's not being handcuffed. You could undo yourself and get out. It's like it's not completely submissive. Right.
SPEAKER_02That's like asking. You see, I'm like just a slightly, yeah, yeah.
SPEAKER_06Because I could get out of it if I wanted to. Right.
SPEAKER_02You've got an escape patch.
SPEAKER_06I'm still not giving up that control yet. You didn't handcuff me there. You didn't make it so I can't get out. Yeah.
SPEAKER_04Cool.
SPEAKER_06Nobody's gonna even put those little chick handcuffs. I'm like, no. You can put them on yourself. And you go figure out how to get out of them. No, thank you.
SPEAKER_05Yeah.
SPEAKER_02But so you do like the being in the more dominant kind of a role.
SPEAKER_01Mm-hmm.
SPEAKER_02Yeah. So when did that like for you? I mean, I guess like watching CSI.
SPEAKER_06Yes, that was okay,
Stephanie's Sex Education
SPEAKER_06and then I'll tell you the other one. So my first two years in college, because I only went two and then I dropped out, and then I went back later and then finished. Um, I took psychosexual adjustment. Oh, okay. Yes.
SPEAKER_02That's for our final. Sounds like a great course.
SPEAKER_06It was amazing.
unknownAmazing.
SPEAKER_06I still have that book somewhere. But our teacher was amazing. And so at the end, you had to pick three out of five. Strip club, gay bar, um, nudist colony, um, gay priest. Um, I can't remember what the fifth was, to be honest.
SPEAKER_02But so you had to pick three out of the five to go experience it or yes, and write a paper about it. Oh, cool. That's a great class.
SPEAKER_06So, yes. Um, and in each experience, you can go as a group with like others that were in your class. You can go as an individual, but if you went as an individual, you had to have some proof. Like bring back a napkin or bring back something. So if you went to the bar by yourself, you know, um, the strip bar or wherever, Maj, that you had to bring back some proof. That's it. Um, do you know what's in Murphy's borough? Um wait, do you know what's three I toes? What what? Three I'm oh, and it was a drag queen. Have a conversation with a drag queen.
SPEAKER_02Okay, that was your fifth. That was your fifth one.
SPEAKER_06I was like, damn it, I know I'm gonna remember this.
SPEAKER_02So what's in Murphy's borough? Is I think there's like a nudist colony or something out in Murphy's Borough.
SPEAKER_06Yes, there is.
SPEAKER_02Yes, there is. I've never been, but I've I've heard tell.
SPEAKER_06Okay, so you know me. I had to pick three.
SPEAKER_02Uh-huh. Yeah. Okay, so you went to the nudest colony. Did you get 19?
SPEAKER_06Wait, what are my three?
SPEAKER_02Okay. Um, well, you went to the strip club. You went to the nudest colony. What are the choices again?
SPEAKER_06Talk to a drag queen.
SPEAKER_02Yeah.
SPEAKER_06Uh talk to a gay priest or go to a gay bar.
SPEAKER_02Huh. I think you went to the gay bar.
SPEAKER_06Well, I kind of got two for one.
SPEAKER_02What do you mean?
SPEAKER_06I talked to a drag queen at a gay bar. Oh, so you went to the jungle.
SPEAKER_02You went extra credit.
SPEAKER_06Yes, I went to the jungle.
SPEAKER_02And then later student you were.
SPEAKER_06And then later, someone from each of those places came and talked in our class.
SPEAKER_03Oh, that's true.
SPEAKER_06So there was a gay priest, there was, you know, all these people, yes. And someone from the Murphy's borough newest colony came.
SPEAKER_04Oh.
SPEAKER_06You can at when they give the tour, you can choose to get fully naked, choose to wear a few clothes, but you have to lose something. You cannot come fully dressed, even for the tour.
SPEAKER_04Gotcha.
SPEAKER_06Um, and you will be experiencing naked people everywhere. Yeah. It's surrounded by mountains, it's very secluded, it is very private. There is a lake, you can do whatever. Um, there's a little camp. Um, at least there was when I went, and this is many years ago, but still.
SPEAKER_02But still it was fun.
SPEAKER_06It it was a different experience.
SPEAKER_02Yeah. Okay, so you did the nudest colony.
SPEAKER_06Went to the jungle.
SPEAKER_02Went to the jungle.
SPEAKER_06And so the jungle, I mean, that's another one that I don't think I it was a um it was a gay bar, but it also had the um drag show.
SPEAKER_01Okay.
SPEAKER_06And they had the best drag shows. Oh it was like Victor Victoria. Uh so Victor Victoria was on fifth and broad, fourth and broad, very dry queen bar, very gay bar. Yeah. And I hung out in these places. I mean, they didn't they're just people, they're like us, they're just being who they are. And I loved that.
SPEAKER_04Yeah, yeah.
SPEAKER_06I I just uh you know, I think I took a lot of pride in that and the fact that I was like, damn, I love that you have this much confidence to be like, fuck the world, this is who I am. You know, it's like RuPaul broke through that ceiling first, and I just always thought, I'm like, you are a beautiful woman. I know you're not, but damn, when you become a woman, you are a beautiful woman. It it just Nashville taught me a lot growing up here. It's like, you know, I've been here since I was 18.
SPEAKER_04Yeah.
SPEAKER_06And you know, I've watched the bars change, I've watched First Avenue change. I never will
Prince Albert Piercings and Threesomes
SPEAKER_06forget, okay, I had a roommate, and the only person I ever had a threesome with, just say that, or a female experience with, just say that too. But anyway, um, we go out one night and we're having a great time, and she decides that she's gonna go home with this person. And so at the time we were working at Bar Nashville, and for those of you who don't know about Bar Nashville, they had um cages that came down, and we were called go-go dancers, and we were just paid to dance. Yeah, and so we worked real jobs during the day. Yeah, we went there at night, we danced like every three or four songs you would get in the cage and go up. But depending on how many of us there were that night, you rotated, and so you were never there long enough, you know, that long. But anyway, so we would get off there, and then once we got off, uh we would go to this place called the after hours. It was called the church, but it was literally an old church, yeah, and it was a BYOB.
SPEAKER_02I think I remember this place.
SPEAKER_06And people used to go there to dance after hours, and it was open from like one until literally seven in the morning, and they would kick us all out when the sun started coming up, boop, you're gone. Okay, right. So my friend decides she's gonna go home with this person. This was how I got educated what a Prince Albert was.
SPEAKER_02Oh, okay.
SPEAKER_06Yes.
SPEAKER_02So Prince Albert, okay, so so your friend calls me. Oh, okay.
SPEAKER_06Calls me early in the morning, like very, very early in this Sunday morning. I'm thinking, oh, oh, she needs me to come get her already. And she's like, I need you to come and get me. I'm like, can I wait a little bit?
SPEAKER_01Yeah.
SPEAKER_06Oh, okay. No, I need you to come get me and take me to the hospital. I'm sorry. Oh, okay. Tell me where. I'll figure it out and I'll be right there. You know, and we didn't have Google, we didn't have GPS, we didn't have all this crap, you know. You just kind of had to know where to go because you knew the area and figured it out. You went back to where you were last night, and that was where she was, right? Took her to the hospital because the Prince Albert that this gentleman had had gotten lost in my friend.
SPEAKER_04Oh my god.
SPEAKER_06So that was how I was informed what a Prince Albert was.
SPEAKER_04Gotcha.
SPEAKER_06And um, for those who don't know, a Prince Albert is a penis piercing through the side and out the hole.
SPEAKER_02Yeah. And his somehow came out. That's crazy.
SPEAKER_06And was in her. And that was the phone call I got was can you take me to the ER?
SPEAKER_02Yeah.
SPEAKER_06And that was my first exposure to a Prince Albert.
SPEAKER_02Yeah, that to me does not look like a piercing that would come out easily.
unknownNo.
SPEAKER_02So I mean, this probably needs to go on the list of ladies. If you have experienced a Prince Albert. A Prince Albert, and it hasn't put you in the hospital, and it was a good experience, then we want to know. Yeah. Well, so okay, so the threesome that you had, because of course I want to ask you about that, right?
SPEAKER_01Yeah.
SPEAKER_02Um, was with this woman. And was it with the Prince Albert guy?
SPEAKER_06Hell no.
SPEAKER_02Okay. So it was somebody else that's right.
SPEAKER_06And that was when I noticed threesomes were not my favorite.
SPEAKER_02Oh, gotcha.
SPEAKER_06Because he was mine, and I was very territorial, and I was like, mm-hmm, this is not okay with me. No, I don't like this. Yeah, I gotcha.
SPEAKER_02Cool. So yeah, check that box.
SPEAKER_06Prince Albert, never gonna check that box. No. Yeah. And and I I had another threesome in my life, but it was too many. And we Okay. And that was an interesting experience too. So I can't say I really enjoyed that one either.
SPEAKER_02Yeah.
SPEAKER_06Because I I felt like I did not have control of that one.
SPEAKER_02Oh yeah. I got to.
SPEAKER_06No, nothing bad happened.
SPEAKER_02Right, but it just wasn't your thing.
SPEAKER_06I mean, because it really just was not messing.
SPEAKER_02Yeah, you prefer to be the one driving the action.
SPEAKER_06Yes, I pr I prefer the one driving that train. Yes. Yeah. And controlling
Sex, Shame, and Society Today
SPEAKER_06that. It it's interesting how, you know, in in the 90s and the 2000s, it was like sex was all over TV. Look at it now. People don't talk about sex. They're so scared. I know that is interesting. It's not even on TV anymore. Yeah. I mean, we don't even have like sex in the city. It's like, oh, we're only gonna give you a few episodes per per every two years. And and that was very like, oh, okay, Miranda's with a girl. Okay. Yeah. It's just we don't talk about it. We don't talk about it on TV. We don't talk about it in life. Yeah. I mean What do you think that is? I don't know. I really wonder, and I kind of worry for this generation because if you look at them, they don't date. They want to stay at home, less and less learn how to drive a car, um, more and more stay at home with their parents. They live at home with their parents. These AI bots, people are having relationships with AI bots.
SPEAKER_02Yeah. And that's only gonna get more.
SPEAKER_06And that's so sad to me because it isolates people more and more and more. It is. Yeah. And then we don't talk about sex because you're not having that interaction of the feeling. You know? And I guess that's what's happened to me, like, because I've gotten older, it's like I don't know, I feel like some days I just have sex just to have a connection with him and be like, this is my human, this is my person. We're it we're not having sex to per procreate, we're not having sex to be wild and crazy and swinging our sex wing. We're it's like a connection, it's like something that like brings us back to like who we are, but people just don't. You know, I remember going to like bachelorette parties and getting like lingerie and a sex lube and this and that. Do you remember going? Oh, did you ever go to like loom parties and all that kind of stuff where somebody would be like, So this is the newest dildo, and I know I have this cherry flavored this.
SPEAKER_02Yeah, yeah. I have been to a couple parties like that, and I have a friend who that's our business that she runs part of.
SPEAKER_06So but I feel like that's not yeah, as I mean, it used to be like Tupperware and sex parties. You had both. Yeah, yeah. I mean, you had coffee and tea with this one, you had vodka and tequila with this one, you know.
SPEAKER_02It's like yeah, it's like it's gone underground kind of. Yes, again.
SPEAKER_06Yeah. I mean, your bars are going smaller and smaller for people to meet each other and for people to be open and be who they are. Menage is gone. Right. Yeah. I mean, it was kind of like what we were talking about, how you've moved all the bad bars. Oh dead.
SPEAKER_03Bad bars. Yeah. Put them all on the bad street. Yeah, yeah.
SPEAKER_06Near the hospital. Across the street from the clicker store. It it makes me sad, Marvin. I'll never live as crazy as I did. It's it's not who we are now. We're we're calming down, we're settling into life. But it doesn't mean that we don't enjoy it and be like, oh, oh, you're reading that sultry book and you're like, oh hey.
SPEAKER_02Loving this. Right. For writing it. That too. A little erotica.
SPEAKER_03Yeah, I know.
SPEAKER_02I mean, I I don't know. It's funny that you say that, that you think that the it's almost like the pendulum. Because I have thought that too, but I haven't really, you know, I didn't know if that was just kind of my subjective perception of the world, and but but it did seem that way to me.
SPEAKER_06It seemed very open. Like it was everywhere. Like movies were about it. I mean, like Moon Rouge. I mean, it was all about sex stripping and you know, I mean, it was so much, I don't want to say in your face, but I mean, like, Tennessee passed a law that you can't um go to pornography websites unless you register your driver's license. Right, right. It's like, what? Yeah, what happened to the privacy act?
SPEAKER_02Yeah. And so the part of that that I am happy that they're doing some of those things is I know that they're trying to combat sex trafficking, which is which is incredible, yeah. Which is incredible, right? But yeah, but it is like, whether it's intended or not, a consequence of some of what's happened is that yeah, it's like you're putting a taboo on the rest of it. It's hard to talk about it, and everything's become so like you can't. I mean, I uh this is there's a woman that I follow, she has a podcast that she's had for years called Sex with Emily. And her Instagram account that she's had forever has been blocked for nine months because the title has sex has sex in it. And you know, I mean, people that I know who are creating content that is sex positive are always having to do these kind of like cheesy really tricks to try to get their content to not get blocked or taken down just because they use the word sex or vagina or whatever, and and it's like, yeah, we've become so we're going back to that society where we can't talk about those words.
SPEAKER_06Yeah, you can't say vagina anymore. Right. Shh. You're tabic now. Don't you be saying that.
SPEAKER_02And I don't know how it happened, honestly. I don't know. I really don't either.
SPEAKER_06I mean, that's what I'm trying to figure out. It's like I'm I don't know. I'm I feel like today's society judges us so much, and I'm so sick of people judging me all the time that I'm like, really just with simple things, people judge us now. And I just like, yeah. I love the parents that have those conversations with their kids. Oh, yeah.
SPEAKER_02And like to open that conversation and try to yeah, yeah. Yeah. I mean, I do too, um, because well, I mean, you know, I uh the world I grew up in, there was a lot of conservative thought about, which is inter it it's interesting to me that the world was actually not so conservative because my little bubble that I grew up in was very conservative, and so I was largely unaware that the rest of the world was actually very liberal about this stuff.
SPEAKER_01Yeah.
SPEAKER_02And then in my personal life, I became increasingly liberal. And you're like as I got older, and now of course obviously I have this podcast to write filthy books and just all of it, you know.
SPEAKER_06I love that you're saying this though, because I wondered if it was like an age thing and if I was just seeing something that nobody else was. I really and for you to say no, I see it too, I was wondering that too. Because like TV, movies, movies, like you don't see anything anymore. Like, when was the last time you saw a good R-rated movie? When was the last time you saw a good magic mic? You know, something that got your heart racing that you know, people wanted to go home and have sex. People wanted to talk about sex. I mean, there's not been a lot. Like, I mean, the gray books. Right. We haven't had anything that like broke that ceiling in a while that people were like, damn, did you see this or did you did you read this? Or nothing, you know?
SPEAKER_02Yeah. Yeah, it's crazy to think about how long ago those books were now. But they did. I mean, they were like every woman that I knew was talking about them, and women that did not even even talk about sex or very type of oh my god.
SPEAKER_06And it was like, I read the Craig.
SPEAKER_01Exactly.
SPEAKER_06Did you read them?
SPEAKER_05Yeah.
SPEAKER_06I mean, you had women of all ages. Reading them and then you know, women who didn't want to admit that they read them who would like kind of secretly be like, Oh hee, you know, it it let you know they're freaking human. Yeah, I'm sorry, they're fucking human. Yeah. You know me. Yeah. I don't know why I'm being polite. Haven't been polite this whole night.
SPEAKER_02Oh yeah. So yeah, absolutely. I mean and I I am so I mean one of the reasons why I wanted to do this podcast is because I'm convinced that there's I think there's always been, but there's even more now like a gap between like the truth and what and specifically around women and how sexual they are and how you know like what we're going backwards. You know, that like what they're expected to be and what sort of you know and so it's like there's this gap between the story that's being told the narrative that's being told about who women are sexually and then like if you just like have a one-on-one conversation with a woman and and they feel comfortable enough to just be honest. Yeah and then you're and then you're Wait, who? You know, it's like it's like no, there's there's more there's so much more to the story.
SPEAKER_04Yeah.
SPEAKER_02And every woman I've talked to is different, you know, like every every interview's been different, but every single one of them has thoughts and feelings and dreams and all these kind of things about, you know, or stories in their history that you know, all of which don't fit into this like into today's society. Into today's society.
SPEAKER_06I would have never been away or able to get away with the things I did. You know, I would have never learned and met the people that I did. People are ashamed to be who they are, and now we're stopped talking about it again. Yeah. So I'm glad somebody else still talks about it again.
SPEAKER_02Yes, no, thank you for being willing to still talk about it.
SPEAKER_06Of course. I mean, the minute I heard you were doing this, I was like, wait, why was I not the first person to ask? I mean, you should have opened with that as your first podcast. Hello, let me introduce you to the woman who said, Is that a vagina? Because that's what I see.
SPEAKER_02Yeah, yeah. Yeah, no.
SPEAKER_03And then we became friends.
SPEAKER_02Yes, we did.
SPEAKER_03Oh, that's crazy.
SPEAKER_02Well, I love you.
SPEAKER_03I love you too.
SPEAKER_02Thank you so much for that.
SPEAKER_03Thank you for having me.
SPEAKER_06Yeah. Sorry, was I a little filthy? I think we need to have a part two.
SPEAKER_02I feel like there's so much more we can be talking about. I feel like we kind of earmarked several pages that we could have done a deep dive on that we didn't really. And I feel like there's definitely much more that you know, depending on how comfortable you are. I feel like we need to come back. We could totally dive deeper into some of these stories. Yeah. I'm just saying. And I'm certain that the the listeners would love.
SPEAKER_06That would be amazing. I mean, let's see. We can get those ratings and be like, hello.
SPEAKER_03Talk dirty with us. Oh. Yeah. That would be awesome.
Marvin aka Morgan HaleThanks for listening to Filthy Little Secrets. I hope we left you feeling light, free, and inspired to explore your filthy sexual horizons. If you want more, subscribe to get all the filthy feature funds. If you're a sex positive woman who'd like to burn another bra of shame, I want to talk to you. Want to come on the show and tell your story? Go to Morganhale Books.com slash podcast to learn more. That's M O R G A N H A L E Books dot com Slash Podcast. Until next time, this is Morgan Hale, urging you to keep it real and filthy.